Monday, January 01, 2007


Well, yes, it's that time of the year after all, isn't it?

Let me see, if I were Georges W Bush, I would promise not to hamper the work of Congress and Senate in the coming years, and if I were really, really honest, I'd impeach myself and step down from power, beseeching the American public to elect a Democratic president and stand by her/him while s/he spends long years wading through all thre mistakes and stupidities I did to make my country and the world a mess.

If I were Jacques Chirac, I'd announce I'm going to be candidate for the coming presidential election, just for the fun of watching Nicolas Sarkozy go through all the shades of green, grey and white, and then I'd announce it was just a joke. Then my dear old friend Nicolas would go through all the shades of red, and that would also be lots of fun.

If I were Joseph Ratzinger, the man who got a new name for free in the Vatican, I'd promise I'd mind my own business and would never, ever again interfere in the mundane affairs of the world. I'd swear to stop trying to push my religious beliefs into the laws that govern countires made up with people of many faiths, and of no faith at all who have no reason to bow to my own dogma.

If I were the president of Iran, I'd swear I'd go back to school and learn my lesson concerning the holocaust. I'd also go visit Auschwitz and Buchenwald, and then I'd publicly announce that I've been a jerk and a honorless bastard.

If I were one of the mollahs or religious authorities in Iran, Afghannistan, Pakistan, Saudi Arabia or any other Islamic country, I'd swear I'd undergo a sex change and I'd promise to live under my own backward, obsolete and slavist religious laws as a woman, so at least I'd know what I'm saying when I decide to stone women or whip them in public when they have the "gall" to simply want to exist as human beings.

If I were the CEO of Haliburton, I'd discover my destiny is that of a born-again ecologist, and I'd stop all my attempts to pollute the world even more than it is now. I'd also swear to stop doing everything I can for my own immediate profit no matter what the price, and I'd finance all the research to master renewable energy sources. Oh, and I'd also reveal all the projects my company and all the other oil companies of the world have hidden away in their closets for years because they might just dwindle our gigantic profits.

If I were a honest-to-god capitalist, complete with my full set of stocks, I'd burn said stocks in the hearth, and swear I'd pay my taxes so that social rights can be assured and granted with equity for all the workers of the world. I'd stop thirsting after my own immediate profit, and care more about the people enslaved whose suffering and gruesome work conditions are the source of my end-of-year bonus.

If I were Vladimir Poutine, I'd hire all the diplomats available to get me out of all the bloody messes I've let myself get swamped into over the years, be they in Chechnya or elsewhere.

If I were the China authorities...I'd just go drown myself in the ravaged rivers devoured by deadly pollution that I've created by my own irresponsible management. I'd also call back all the settlers I forcefully sent to Tibet, and I'd release Tibet to its people, and I'd beg the forgiveness of those I tortured and hunted, and tried to eradicate when they hadn't ever done me any wrong. I'd also be so ashamed to still have the label "communist" when all I do is help the great Western international companies to enslave my own people and to make huge profit out of the blood and sweat of my people (provided I get a small percentage of the profit generated by each, of course), that I'd bar it from whatever label I'd choose for my political party. I'd also come public with that and promise that I'd never have the gall to call China a "People's Republic" again, but that I'd call it what it is: "Slave and Profit Reserve for the Western Fools Who Thus Precipitate their Own Demise, and Incidentally for the new Rich Class Emerging Here".

If I were the Japanese authorities, I'd promise I'd stop with the stupid visits to Yakiniku shrine. And I'd also promise I'll never step away from Japan's peaceful constitution, and that I'd never, ever forget the atrocities of the bomb or allow Japan to fall into the direction of making such a bomb.

I could go on like this for quite a while, but then I'm sure you can also make your own list.

As for me, I fear I intend to be as bad, if not worse, than I was last year.

I won't watch less anime.

I won't read less manga.

I won't watch less TV series.

I won't read less Fantasy or SF.

I won't stop writing.

I won't stop being a pain in the ass of some people.

I won't stop watching the world with my eyes wide open, and barbered words ready.

I won't stop loving Saint Seiya.

I won't stop keeping an eye out for the dangers of all religions that want to meddle in my life and in things that are outside of their domain, notably the laws that regulate a citizen's everyday life.

I won't stop believing that even the little things you do, however small, matter.

I won't stop believing that what we do, who we are and what we say matters.

I won't stop believing we can make a difference.

I won't stop believing we're not alone in this vast universe.

I won't stop eating extra-dark chocolate.

I won't stop RPGing.

I won't stop being a brat and behaving like a kid, no matter how old I get.

All in all, I won't stop being myself.

Happy New Year! ^^

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